KPI Data Room

Nobody Counts

Think The Church is just another meme-fueled rocket to the moon? Think again, anon.

While Nobody might work in mysterious ways, The Church operates on cold, hard data. Every prayer answered, every soul saved, every satoshi stacked — Nobody measures it all.

To flex supreme dominance The Holy See has decreed these Divine Metrics:

1. Fan Base,
2. Revenue,
3. Treasury Size

The current target is to double down on everything.
Why? Because Nobody does things by halves.

All data laid bare. Nobody’s watching, and so can you.